Superman Complex Explored
If you always put others first, then you’re bound to have times in life when people let you down. Are you constantly getting hurt because you’re the savior type? Are you the type of guy who lives to help others, but you find that your efforts are never appreciated?
Have you ever thought to yourself, “Life’s all about helping other people, but some people don’t deserve to be helped.”
Or “No matter what I do, people just don’t appreciate me.”
If so, you may have the superman complex, otherwise known as the savior archetype. On this page, you will see the terms used interchangeably. Your natural inclination to help others can backfire and leave you feeling vulnerable and traumatized. Even though you’ve dedicated your life to being a problem solver, sometimes your own problems are the hardest ones to fix.
What is the Superman Complex?
In the simplest of terms, someone who resonates with the savior archetype has an instinctual need to rescue or save others. This might manifest as a need to “fix” people’s problems or the urge to get involved with problematic situations in other people’s lives. You have a self-sacrificing nature, and you might never get the credit or acknowledgement that you feel you deserve.
The savior archetype can be a healthy character trait if it’s presented with the right balance. It means you’re willing to tackle difficult challenges and you can be depended on to help out when there’s a crisis. You might be an ideal fit for a career in the military, law enforcement, or similar roles.
Related: What’s your love style?
The superman complex from deep core beliefs about yourself, others, and the world around you. When you were a child, you might’ve had to take on too much responsibility. You might’ve experienced neglect as a child and felt that the only way to have love is by earning it through deeds. You might believe that your happiness is conditional on how much you can do for others.
The savior archetype is also heavily influenced by the iconic savior image of Jesus Christ. His character comes down through history as spotless and pure. His whole mission is to save the world at the cost of his own life. This religious savior is the product of a miracle from birth and has a regal lineage.
Living up to the ideal of the religious savior is meant to be impossible. Otherwise, the religious savior wouldn’t be the ideal figure above all others. Yet, when someone who identifies with the savior archetype tries to embody those ideals in their real life, they’re bound to have problems.
Problems that Arise
The superman complex is built around the concept of self-sacrifice. The savior type often puts their own wellness needs on the backburner. If you’re the savior type, then you’ve probably been victimized by the very same people you’ve tried to help.
The savior archetype can also become over-controlling of people close to them and actually drive everyone away. It’s not that you’re trying to dominate others. It’s just that you feel an almost overwhelming need to fix their issues. You might also feel that you’re the only one who can do it. This might come as a revelation, but some people just don’t want to be fixed.
So, how do you know if you’re the savior archetype? Well, it’s pretty easy to spot. Here are some quick indicators that you have the savior archetype.
- You’re attracted to broken or needy partners.
- You think you were called to help others by other-worldly forces.
- You place everyone else’s needs ahead of yours.
- You feel like a failure if you can’t fix other people’s problems.
- You get offended if other people don’t appreciate your efforts to rescue them.
- You expect to be rewarded for fixing problems and rescuing others.
As you can see from these characteristics of the savior archetype, this type of person means well but can easily be misunderstood. People might think that the savior type is intrusive and needy themselves. Also, the savior type doesn’t focus on his own problems enough. Instead, he’s trying to put out everyone else’s fires.
How Does “Superman” Save himself??
The savior archetype can accomplish so much good in this world, but he’s bound to experience tremendous heartache and disappointment from others. It’s basically hardwired into the whole framework of this archetype. Yet, nobody tells you how to cope with that barrage of negativity that comes with it.
If you identify with the savior archetype and you’ve been left broken or isolated as a result, then you should try to work on healing yourself. This might mean that you’re up for some serious reflection into what motivates you to be a savior type in the first place. Are you reacting to others’ problems because nobody stepped in to help you when you were in need? Are you trying to be a religious savior? If so, do you really think it’s possible to live up to that miraculous ideal?
After taking a hard look in the mirror, you should look at the way you interact with other people. You need to see others and their motivations with clear eyes. Know that you can be compassionate without leaping to everyone’s need. You can also be sympathetic without automatically offering solutions. Acknowledge that some people are a one-way street and they’ll never reciprocate the care that you’ve shown them.
Related: Do Scorpio men love differently?
Being a savior type is difficult. You have a need to help others that can’t be ignored. You can lean forward into that role, but you need to also include yourself in that category. Your physical and emotional needs shouldn’t be neglected or placed last on this list of priorities. You don’t need to “earn” good things for yourself. It’s perfectly alright to exercise your savior skills on yourself first and foremost.
Transformation and Change
There is one characteristic of the superman complex is that most people ignore and that’s the savior’s ability to transform himself and transcend the mortal realm. So, if you’re struggling with the savior archetype it can be helpful to consider that popular models of the savior archetype embraced fundamental change. Jesus, Krishna, and Buddha all experienced a metamorphosis or rebirth.
Likewise, if you’re going to save yourself from the shadowy aspects of the savior archetype, then you should explore ways to transcend your current situation. Like the phoenix, you can rise from the ashes if you’ve been hurt as the savior type. Create better boundaries with people and find ways to help them that doesn’t override their will.
You can make deeper connections with people if you base those relationships on mutual respect and commitment. Recognize that you might be a savior, but you might not be everybody’s savior. Your skills and talents for helping others might not always be the ideal fit for every situation and that’s perfectly fine.
Summing it Up
If you’re looking for more clarity into the savior archetype, then check out this book from Lucy Hughes-Hallett. It’s called “Heroes, Saviors, Traitors, and Supermen” (see Amazon). It examines historically eminent characters who identified with one or more of these archetypes. You might find yourself in these pages.
Also, you should embrace all aspects of your personality. Just because you identify with the savior archetype doesn’t mean that you have to always put the needs of others before your own. Do some journaling and write down your core beliefs and principles. Get in tuned with what makes you unique and be willing to embrace aspects of your personality that fall outside the boundaries of the so-called savior type.
You shouldn’t change your love for helping others. Just be sure that you are always acting from a place of love and avoid the urge to take control of every situation. Sometimes, people learn more from their failures. No matter how difficult it might be, there are instances when you need to let others work out their own problems in their own way.
Taking a step back and prioritizing yourself might be the key to saving the savior.
